The Etiquette of the Block
You don't owe an explanation to someone who is making you feel unsafe. Scott and Laurie break down the difference between ghosting and guarding your perimeter.
Latest
Men Are More Romantic Than Women. Science Says So.
*Based on the Modern Wisdom podcast episode "The Truth About Sex Differences That Gets Scientists In Trouble" with Dr. Steve Stewart-Williams, evolutionary psychologist and author of A Billion Years of Sex Differences. Published July 2026. Watch it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=roXX9iuPQIA*
Bone-Tired, Guarded, and Still Hopeful: What One Question Revealed About LDS Dating Right Now
We asked a group of mid-singles to describe their dating lives in one word. The answers broke our hearts — and revealed something important about what it actually costs to keep showing up.
The Mirror You Keep Refusing to Look At
A post went up recently in the LDS Dating Midsingles group on Facebook that pulled 40 reactions and 105 comments in the first 2 hours. It was posted anonymously, which, honestly, tracks. The man who wrote it spent several paragraphs cataloguing his credentials: the 60 pounds he has lost, the
Why Are LDS Men Not Choosing LDS Women? (And Why That Question Is Only Half the Story)
A post in the "LDS Mid Singles, Authentic and Imperfect" Facebook group recently cracked open a very old wound. Someone asked the question that has been circulating in midlife LDS singles spaces for years: why are LDS men not choosing LDS women? The thread that followed was long,
The Loophole Is Not the Same Thing as Integrity
A woman posted anonymously in the LDS Dating Midsingles Facebook group on June 9th and asked something that apparently a lot of people have been thinking but not saying out loud. She had noticed a pattern: some LDS men seem to move the goalposts on physical boundaries whenever it'
The Red Flag Question That Revealed More About the Men Than the Women
A man in the LDS Dating Midsingles Facebook group posted a question last month that generated 440 comments, 43 reactions, and no small amount of chaos. The question, accompanied by a graphic, was simple enough: "What is an instant red flag in a woman, no matter how pretty she
The Most Important First-Date Question Is Not "Are You Married?"
Someone in the LDS Dating Midsingles group posted a simple prompt recently: "What is the most important question to ask on a first date?" It came with a cheerful graphic of a couple at a table. The post collected 244 comments. The thread did not go the direction
Men, The Interview Is Over: What Midlife Women Are Actually Telling You
A woman in the GenX Singles group on Facebook posted a simple, direct question: "Ladies, what is your biggest turn off during initial communications with men?" She answered it herself first. Bring up sex right out the gate. That was it. The question got 228 reactions and 471
When the Thread Turns Into a Warzone (And Nobody Wins)
Scott & Laurie Weigh In: Everyone was presenting evidence. Nobody was actually listening.
When Men Say They Want Peace, What Do Women Hear?
A post went up in the LDS Dating - Midsingles group earlier this week with a simple prompt: "Things men find unattractive in women. Men speak out, we are listening." Within days it had generated nearly 200 comments and close to 600 reactions. The thread became a sprawling,
When "Honesty" Becomes the Cruelest Thing in the Room
A post appeared in LDS Dating - Midsingles last week that generated over 330 comments and nearly a thousand reactions. The original poster wanted to talk about health and attraction. He opened by acknowledging that "we cannot have an honest conversation about attraction on here without fighting," then
advice-column
When "Active" Doesn't Mean What You Think It Means
A woman in the LDS Dating - Midsingles Facebook group posted something that clearly struck a nerve. She wanted to know why inactive men, with no intention of becoming active, keep reaching out to her when her profile explicitly states she's looking for active LDS members. The frustration
blog
When the Sacred Becomes a Checkpoint: The Architecture of Religious Sexual Control
When a community ties belonging and spiritual safety to sexual compliance, and enforces it through recurring interviews and confession norms, it reliably creates fear-based self-policing. That's not just 'values.' That's behavioral control.
Podcast
Trading in Worthiness Scorecard for Love
Have you ever sat in a chapel pew, supposed to feel peace, while a silent fire alarm of perfectionism blares in your head? You are not alone, and it is not unworthiness.
advice-column
5/28/26: When "How Long Do I Have to Wait?" Is the Wrong Question
A post appeared in the LDS Dating Midsingles group this week that cut straight to the bone. A man asked, essentially, how long a spouse has to withhold sex before it becomes acceptable to seek "alternative avenues." The post gathered 93 comments in a matter of hours. The
advice-column
5/27/2026 - Is a "Barbie Figure" a Deal-Breaker? Wrong Question. Better One Below.
Someone in an LDS Dating - Midsingles Facebook group posted a question recently — framed, as these things often are, as "asking for a friend." The question: would a non-Barbie figure be a deal-breaker for men in the group? Nearly 200 comments arrived before anyone could catch their breath.
blog
WCS Post 4: When Repentance Becomes the Problem
Repentance itself doesn't break people. But when the prescribed process, the one meant to restore someone, instead convinces them more deeply than before that they are fundamentally unfit for the grace of God and the fellowship of those who follow him, that process is the problem.
Podcast
Does LDS Worthiness Culture Harm or Help Individuals?
A reflective conversation about how cultures of worthiness can become private perfectionism — and how to reclaim belonging without performing for approval.
advice-column
May 8, 2026: When Even a Good Man Feels Like One More Thing on the List
Ever met a great guy and realized you don't want a date, you just want a nap? You aren't broken. If romance feels like adding one more chore to your endless to-do list, pay attention: exhaustion is information. Here is why you are allowed to go slower than the chemistry.
blog
When the Inquisition Comes for You
An anonymous Facebook post about dating exhaustion recently turned into a vicious moral purity spiral. What happened in that thread wasn't an anomaly. It was a perfect, real-time demonstration of Worthiness Culture... and data shows is hemorrhaging the church's most devoted members.
advice-column
May 7, 2026: You Are Not Behind. You Are Running the Wrong Simulation.
Wild rats swim for 15 minutes before they give up. Rescued rats swim for 60 HOURS. You're not broken. You just haven't been rescued yet. 🐀
advice-column
May 6, 2026: The Story You Keep Telling About Them Is Actually About You
You've told the story of what they did 10,000 times. Research shows every single retelling makes the grip tighter. The person you can't stop thinking about might actually be you. 👀
blog
WCS Post 3: Loved Anyway
I asked her 'are we over?' after we'd already worked it out. She looked at me like I was speaking a foreign language. 'When I work it out, I move on.' It was the first time in my life I'd seen what real forgiveness actually looks like.